Why I Dig Power Chicks in Hollywood
I’ve been hesitant to write a blog on this topic, mostly because I don’t want to come off sounding like some whiny, ungrateful, bra-burning feminist in Hollywood.
BUT…
When the article about Barret Swatek and I came out in Script Magazine last month (see the Web Innovators article below), I was pleasantly surprised. Not only did they decide to profile two women, but two women who choose to act in their material.
Now I don’t know about everyone else, but whenever I’m in a pitch room, I always tiptoe around the acting part. In the past, it’s the first thing I’ve been willing to give up in the deal making process. Not because I don’t want to be in front of the camera, but because subconsciously I’m hoping that giving up the acting will allow me to be perceived more seriously as a writer/producer.
Now I’ve never met Barret Swatek, but after talking to some of the other female actress/writer/producer/web creators out there, I’m fairly confident that we would have more than a few things to bond about over margaritas. It’s called What’s Your Story? How I Fight The Actress/Writer/Producer Stigma. I’m sure the conversation would make a decent one hour companion piece to Inside the Actor’s Studio.
Tina Fey broke the mold on a macro level by creating, and starring, in unconventional TV and feature comedies. On the unscripted side, Chelsea Handler, Kathy Griffin, and Tyra Banks have redefined the traditional talk show model. And in the dawn of the ‘Content Creation Age’, we have seen a totally new femme fatale emerge.
She knows how to write, produce, and act. She knows how to location scout, wield an HVX, and export quicktime files for different media players. She knows how to market via multiple distribution platforms and how to interact with her audience. And she knows how to do this for pennies on the dollar. Who is she?
Her name is Felicia Day. And Casey McKinnon. And Shira Lazar. And Brigitte Dale. And Taryn O’Neill. And there are many more.
Just one day, I’d like to invite them all over for a sleepover. OMG. To be able to discuss camera lenses, distribution platforms, and wordpress templates all in one night! (It’s no secret that my biggest crushes are on chicks who know how to write their own jokes and code their own websites.)
These women do it all. And yet, I wonder if they feel the same way I do. Do they ever feel they have to compromise that perfect role in order to run the ship?
I find myself facing a similar comment, over and over – “How smart of you – to produce and write your own material so that you can cast yourself as the star!” The notion that I’m merely creating something so that Taryn the actress can quietly slip onto the screen…it makes me cringe.
I can’t deny that there is a growing trend in all of this actress/writer/producer stuff. There is a quiet rule in Hollywood – if you want to get a project made, attach a star by offering them a vanity producing credit. This practice has dramatically increased with the rise of independent films – you want an expensive actor for much less than their quote? Offer them a coveted “Producer” credit! Hooray! Deal done.
Everyone wants to feel valued (actors probably more than anyone), so it’s no wonder they jump at the chance to prove that they’re not just showing up to set and lending a pretty face.
The problem occurs when these actors don’t actually do anything.
While there are some who perform real producer duties, those who don’t simply propel a stigma that actors can’t actually be valuable as writers or producers as well.
Now here’s where I hate to be presumptious, but I feel like this unfortunate view is applied more to women than men. Perhaps because women actresses, on average, have less Hollywood leverage than males. (It’s a fact that male stars bring in more at the box office than females.) Or perhaps because men have a longer history of writing, producing, and starring in their own material. From Charlie Chaplin to the Wayans Brothers – dudes have been at it for awhile. Though more and more women are emerging as creative powerhouses, the numbers are far less.
Regardless of who gets the shit end of the stick, this has been a source of frustration for me. Everytime I create something new, these are the three thought points that consistently run through my head during the pitch process:
1. I must prove that I am not a fraud. While this fear may very well stem from some stupid but clearly crucial moment of past insecurity (i.e. getting booted off American Idol or losing the 8th Grade presidential election to a kid who moonwalked in lieu of an actual speech), the point is: my fear exists.
And so, I embark on trying to prove to you (the studio exec, the prospective director, the actor I want to attach, etc) that I do have skills as a writer/producer. If I am pitching you, this may include: demonstrating my knowledge of three act structure, the legalities of content ownership, optimum export settings for video, blah blah blah. Ready to kill me yet? I know, I want to kill me too.
Why must I feel the need to make sure the person sitting on the other side of that desk knows, that I know, of all things, how to chroma key??
If I am successful in proving #1, then I move onto #2:
2. I must convince everyone on set that I’m not a typical female control freaks. Truth is, I can be quite, err, Type A…but I’m aware of the fine line between leader and bitch. This means trying my hardest not to sound “bossy” and then ordering cupcakes for everyone on set to prove that I’m sort of cool. WHAT?! Males don’t do this nonsense.
3. I must prove that I love the story more than the act. In other words, I’ll sacrifice my on-screen role. The truth is, it is more important for me to tell a story that I care about than fulfill my desire of acting part of it out. But I also shouldn’t have to diminish my passion for acting in the process. In an effort to prove my writing/producing abilities, I wind up selling myself short in the on screen department.
Ok. So I’ve accomplished #1, #2, and #3. Now I can pitch you my brilliant idea.
GRRR! I’m obviously frustrating myself with my silly mental song-and-dance routine. Is it just me, or do other actress/writer/producers feel they have a similar need to diminish their in-front-of-the-camera passions and abilities to be taken seriously as a writer/producer? Do men experience this??
I’m curious to know everyone’s thoughts. Does it diminish a writer or producer, in your eyes, if she is simultaneously acting in her own projects? And for those of you out there who “do it all” (MALES AND FEMALES) and don’t want to sacrifice any part of the process, do you find yourself feeling less-respected in one area than another?
“…if they don’t want to help us, we can do it without them :)”
Precisely right. Persistence is only limited by time, ideas, energy, self-restraint and access to capital. Gender is nowhere in the list.
March 5, 2010 at 8:24 am,
Taryn,
It was great meeting you last night at Tim’s party on the ship. That was an amazing ship wasn’t it? Anyhoo… I had a quick suggestion for you on your YouTube page that you might find pretty valuable that I just saw you weren’t using it now. And I checked out your videos and others things that I could find off Google. Phenomenal job on that.
So that’s about it except when I go back to Oklahoma I’m going to feel robbed from culture staying here in San Francisco.
Remember… be a servant,
Cory
p.s. Facebook page with 5000 fans gone. And I don’t see it coming back after some serious persistence on it. Like Seth Godin says in “The Dip”. The best thing you can do sometimes is “quit”.
February 27, 2010 at 6:54 pm,
^ If you’re asking me, they probably aren’t. I can’t speak for them, but I wasn’t saying that they were. I was just pointing out the parallels in what they were saying and the books.
February 27, 2010 at 1:14 pm,
So.. are creators of webseries disciples of Objectivism?
February 27, 2010 at 3:29 am,
“Feminist” is not a dirty word. And denoting the inequities that women still face is not “whining.”
February 27, 2010 at 2:22 am,
I think Taryn really lit a fuse with this blog.
This is truly one of the most, if not the most, intelligent and enlightening conversations I’ve been a part of.
I’ll throw this out there too: I’m seeing similarities to some books I’ve read, Atlas Shrugged and The Fountainhead. Not sure if those ring a bell to anyone here. They’re very long and everyone’s pretty busy.
They basically say, as relevant to this conversation, that it’s not just good to be a creator, but if you have it in you, it’s your DUTY to use those abilities. Creators are basically the motors of the world, be they inventors or architects or writers.
In Atlas Shrugged, the creators of the world basically hold the world hostage by not creating anything until its inhabitants realize how important they are and do things on their terms.
One character basically has to wear all of the company’s hats because she’s really the only one with ability who hasn’t quit. People resent her success, but she knows she’s doing the right thing and getting things done.
In The Fountainhead, the main character doesn’t deal with what the world expects of him and makes his own path. Someone wants him to make a building that is uninspired; he refuses. He goes on to deal with like-minded individuals almost exclusively.
In both books the creators end up molding the world with their philosophies. So there’s something to think about.
February 26, 2010 at 6:56 pm,
This is an evolving business and we, the creators of our own stories, are a part of it. You should never compromise yourself or your talents by discarding them; if you are talented in more than one area, you damn well have the right to credit yourself in all of them. Taking away ownership in one area in order to make another more “valid” is, quite simply, playing into the exact stereotype that you want to fight. Dr.Martin Luther King, Jr. didn’t stop preaching about race so that he would be taken more seriously by all when he talked about religion; and if he had, the world wouldn’t be in the same place it is today. So it is with our fight; we must push forward through criticism, bias, and pre-concieved notions, and do so consistently, until finally we face down the very unrealistic view that an ‘actor’ has only one thing to contribute. In many cases, producers, writers and directors would be selling themselves short in buying into this idea. Creating is a process that involves many brilliant minds with talents all across the board, and we; those who wear more hats than one, should be fueling this creative process by not only being open with our opinions and talents, but also expecting them to be taken seriously. Start with the woman in the mirror.
February 26, 2010 at 1:43 pm,
I don’t think it diminishes..not on the internet platform because it’s so new and nobody really knows what they are doing. As long as you feel secure in your project and leading it then you can run the gammit. At least that how I see it as an artist which includes performance first, producing and writing.
February 26, 2010 at 2:56 am,
Thank you all so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences. It does make me feel better to know I’m not out on my own little island – and knowing that there’s a small group of fighters out there with me makes the battle all the more worth it :-)
February 26, 2010 at 1:33 am,
I completely feel for you on this subject. I have been acting in my own projects wearing all the hats for over a decade and it’s difficult for me do it but it is often to protect the writing.
I act in other projects for a living and often the quality assurance isn’t there. I have no really say in that production.
I do my work and hope to slip a little “craft” or “art” in there. I, too, have had to overcome the bias that you cant do more than a few things I have heard often, “but your wrote it too,”" you cant direct yourself,”" you cant edit yourself, “”you can produce”" you cant star in it we need a star who means something…” So now I sometimes show my own work not mentioning who did what anymore until the praise for the unnamed person who someone thinks did the other jobs starts coming in and I reveal…oh that was me too.
You are all doing fantastic at it. I don’t care if you are doing it as a woman, most people who count don’t, you are doing a great job, who cares from what gender it comes? We ALL hear it in this business, too young, too old, too fat, not leading man/woman material, not funny enough, too funny, not a name, blah, blah… lack of vision about us knows no gender bounds
I don’t think of it as a female/male issue anymore really, yourself and the women who responded to this article are actually further along, in my mind, more successful and powerful than I am in all the years I have been slogging away at this and thats a long time. You are ahead. And I am so happy for it.
Felicia, Taryn (both), Casey and the other women are LIVING my definition of success already. You have proven it. You are the power in the future, not me or any man.
The elephant in the room is men actually love working with women and want to work with you and the vast majority enjoy the unique female power and energy that working together can bring. A woman doesn’t have to be “more like a man” or have any “masculine” qualities or esp. animosity toward men to be powerful, respected and creative in 2010. Let’s make that our normal.
You all have nothing to prove to me or anyone male or female, you’ve done it so just keep doing it, be kind, be grateful, do great work and learn about this whole strange process for a lifetime.
You are all fantastic women.
February 25, 2010 at 3:36 pm,
You have some really deep thoughts Taryn. Thanks for the post and to everyone who commented. Since everyone already stated their perspective, I won’t add anything new because I don’t want to be repetitive. (no offence to any who commented) I read some of the comments and I agree 100%. Stay positive and keep working everyone.
February 25, 2010 at 2:44 pm,
Great article, Taryn.
It’s true, there is definitely a stigma attached when the writer/producer also wants to act in the piece, and sadly, I believe it is more common with women than men.
Staying positive, there are those who have broken the mold that you’ve mentioned like Tina Fey. On the male side there are several more to mention. From Stallone, to Damon, Gibson and Redford.
If you listen to some interviews with Damon about making Good Will Hunting, he talks about how his script was pigeon-holed for years, but during that time he was slowly earning credits and finally after he had a great break in Courage Under Fire and The Rainmaker, he was given the green light to star in his own script.
So, stay positive, keep creating and earning a name for yourself. You’re already well on your way.
February 25, 2010 at 1:27 pm,
Wow. Am I the only one feeling that this sleepover would end in the formation of a secret society aimed at taking over (or at least significantly changing) Hollywood? I’m only half-kidding about that. There’s strength in numbers, ladies.
But what to name it?
February 25, 2010 at 12:19 pm,
I guess we don’t only share a name but a brain; I was JUST experiencing this very issue. I have had a bunch of meetings in the past month on new projects I’ve written (along with producer/ actress Stephanie Thorpe) and we both quickly side stepped the ‘acting in our own projects’ issue and offered up the ‘whatever is best for the project, we’re happy to attach a name’ response to the query. This just seems like a savvy choice to make in the room so that we/I can be taken seriously as creatives. Otherwise, the suits may just think we are doing all of this (ha!) to serve some form of personal narcissism and make it as an actress.
It’s easy to see how the industry has embraced this viewpoint..partially due to the historical vanity deals that you touched on. I know I’ve unfairly judged actresses (in the past) who have starred in the indie films they wrote and produced. I even agreed with a director/ producer’s advice to take off my credit on a short I co-produced because he thought it would diminish my acting credit. Apparently, getting hired ‘by the system’ is the only way to prove that you are the real deal. This experience also echoes all those times that I’ve been told NOT to discuss my business background in an audition or general meeting (as an actress).
Now that’s all changing, yet here I am, happy to step away from the acting component of a project that I have created. Honestly, in some of the cases (actually most), I’m happy to do so. I have been acting long enough that I don’t see myself in ‘everything’ and just want to put great stories and characters on paper. But your post reminds me that on the projects where my heart and soul is on the page, intrinsically linked with a final draft version of myself, that I will fight for it, and feel confident that I have earned that right.
Now when’s that sleepover?? :)
February 25, 2010 at 2:14 am,
I loved this article and totally agree with a lot that you say. Being a woman and wearing all these hats is much harder in this industry. I actually had a network executive ask me once, “So…you didn’t ACTUALLY write that show, right?” I’ve had an agent suggest to me that since I was “normal” looking I should stop the acting part and concentrate on writing. The other day I was accepting an award and met a guy in the elevator. I asked him “Are you getting an award?” He said, “Yes I am! What are you doing, are you handing them out?” Totally sincerely he said that, he wasn’t being a jerk. I wish I had seen his face when I was announced as a winner too. Oh the irony :)
That’s why we have to keep wearing all those hats, to make the stuff we love and not let the establishment put us in a box. They don’t like it, it’s not the way they operate, but whatever. The great thing about the space is that if they don’t want to help us, we can do it without them :)
February 24, 2010 at 11:01 pm,
Great article Taryn. You bring up some great questions and tremendous insight into some of the fears and doubts that can come with creating something.
To me someone writing and producing their own acting work doesn’t diminish my respect for them in any area, it multiplies it in every area. I admire you and all of the other women you mentioned for putting your work out there and taking control of the projects you want to make and making them. In the end the writing, producing and acting will speak for itself.
One of the great things about this time in entertainment is that everyone has the opportunity to tell the stories they want to tell the way they want to tell them.
I for one am a big fan of strong, independent, talented women, so keep up the great work. Looking forward to seeing what’s next.
Frank
February 24, 2010 at 9:15 pm,
Awwww… that sounds like the BEST SLEEPOVER EVER!!! My guess is, however, that it’ll have months worth of planning to get us all in a room together since we all get so busy! But, I’m up for it anytime you are :)
As for the subject at hand, I feel your pain… it’s a really tough choice. I struggled with attaching my own name to a project I was working on a few months ago, but decided to not attach any names but actor-types instead. It’s best to get the project sold first, then figure it out later. I actually thought of you for the role because you remind me of myself and I feel I can trust you to deliver as an actor.
Whatever you do, do it for the right reasons. If you want, over all else, to be an actress… be an actress. Or come up with a game plan to get to the point you want to be at (ex: maybe not THIS project, but the NEXT one). But if you just want to make awesome stuff and be recognized by your peers, you can do that in any form… TRUST me, I’m always excited to see what you’re doing next!
Personally, I’ve done it all myself out of necessity… if I don’t do it, who will? I love my hosted series, but I’d love to someday just act full time. But, who knows… then perhaps I’ll return to writing/producing/editing/etc. I’m just happy that I’ve developed such a great skill set, I know many people who wish they had that many skills!
Love and respect for everything you do,
Casey
February 24, 2010 at 7:20 pm,
Taryn -
Great article. As you implied at the end, I think all the things you’re feeling in the room are felt by dudes who do this, too. Especially those of us who started out primarily as actors. I know some will argue – societal pressures and expectations are different across genders, esp. in Hollywood. No argument here. But, at the core, I think we feel the same pressure to choose one side of the camera. There’s a two-pronged feeling of guilt (I’m stealing another actor’s job) and shame (maybe I’m not good enough for other people to create roles for me). At least that’s what I feel when I’m writing/producing TV or theater and acting in it.
Then I sit down and start to do the actual work, and realize how much effing work I’m doing on all fronts, and that A) I shouldn’t be guilty, because I’m creating a lot of work for other actors and production folks as well (even if much of it isn’t exactly paid *yet*), and if the project needs it I can choose to step aside, B) to *get* work in this town you have to *do* work, which is exactly what I’m doing, and C) if you have the passion and skills to make good stuff and you *don’t* utilize them all (acting included) on the project you love, you are doing yourself and the project a grave disservice.
I’m not saying here that there’s never a better actor out there for a role I’m playing (a note to all actors at all levels: there’s almost always a better actor out there somewhere), but at the same time I’ll never cast myself in a role I’m not right for, and that I won’t kill when the time comes. And I often cast myself far more narrowly than other people do, just to be safe.
All that said, I try very hard not to direct myself. Not because I think it can’t be done – some people do it very well – but rather because I know I can’t do it at this stage, or at least not very well.
So, IMO, if you are passionate, talented, driven and know your own limitations as well as you know your strengths, there’s no reason not to do it all on a project you’ve created. You’ve done fantastically with it, I think. You, Felicia, Casey, Taryn, Zadi, etc. – you’ve set a high bar for all of us, and given us a great example of something to strive for.
-David
PS: Cody L – thank you for the D&D reference. You should check out my series, GOLD (about pro RPGers). I’m also writing an article for ChattyDM next month outlining the parallels between Indie film production and Dungeon Mastering. I think you and I would get along just fine ;-)
February 24, 2010 at 5:01 pm,
wow, great post Taryn. I understand what you’re going through. Even though I’m not in the acting/producing career, I can relate to you. I can honestly say that you are beautiful and talented at what you do. I believe that one day you will be able to reach your goals and not have theses thoughts anymore. When that day comes,there will be young actors/actress writing similar posts like the one you wrote today.
Good luck Taryn.
February 24, 2010 at 4:47 pm,
I like Zadi already and I don’t even know her. :P
February 24, 2010 at 4:31 pm,
I think it’s reasonably safe to say that many won’t try to second-guess and assume that an actor who is also producer, is just doing the “vanity” thing. Sure, they might “suppose” that it could be, but inasmuch as it does carry some additional weight, I think folks would tend to respect the multi-title more in most cases.
Comparison, perhaps — I’d often notice in TV show credits when an actor from the show was listed as director on an episode. What that told me was, this person cares about the project, they were interested in expanding and “being more than,” and somehow, they had displayed that they had earned the right to competently perform that task.
Hard to say how “Hollywood” views it exactly, but I think your average viewer finds a light, pleasant surprise in realizing, “Oh, she produced/directed it, too!” I think that may be more how it is seen than instead thinking, “Oh, they’re just acting in it ’cause they produced it.”
I’ve met a few folks who’ve ventured to write/produce/direct their own material because they saw it as a way to create roles for themselves. That’s smart, and I don’t see how most would see that as a bad thing. Certainly at least, innovative!
February 24, 2010 at 3:47 pm,
A lot of good points in this post, Taryn.
I can tell you from personal experience, editing over 100 episodes of Epic Fu and other shows, producing content for big boys like PBS, directing/producing national commercials, talking on panels, teaching video production, getting awards, getting press, being in the online game pre-Youtube and learning all the tech and tools that goes along with making content for the web… all of that and I constantly still feel like I have to prove myself.
All. the. time. It never ends.
To your question on whether you feel less respected in one area because you refuse to sacrifice any part of the process. Yes, to a certain extent. Since I’m primarily seen in front of the camera, I feel a constant need to prove that I’m also a pretty damn good producer, or director, or editor. I will say that lately I find myself devoting more time to directing and producing, and I wonder if with time most hybrids will instinctively lean towards one focused role.
One thing is for certain, having had all of this experience gives us all a serious leg up. I think we all have similar personalities, so I can say this with confidence: We’re all going to be kicking some serious butt. ;)
A fan.
February 24, 2010 at 2:08 pm,
And I guess I didn’t directly answer the question. If the end product is good with the writing, producing, and acting by the same person, then they get mega-kudos (or whatever people get these days) from me. If it’s horrible, then they get the almighty facepalm (http://sinigami.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/picard-facepalm2.jpg for those not familiar with the term :P).
February 24, 2010 at 1:26 pm,
Maybe (subconsciously) you don’t want to feel like an egotist or that you’re taking up the spotlight from someone else?
This might be too nerdy of a reference, but I had somewhat of a similar experience playing D&D. (Yes, Dungeons and Dragons. I’m just doing it to hone my creativity, honest!) I want to make a great, epic story as narrator/Dungeon Master, and I want the characters I’m rolling/acting as/voicing to be fantastic, but the other characters have to get “screen time” as well, and be able to interact without feeling like they’re just part of my story.
Some people run into the problem as head writer or narrator or whatever that they know the story and characters better than everyone else, so they should get a lot of time acting or voicing or whatever. Obviously others disagree and call them control freaks or egotists or whatever.
What’s important (from my view) is if you can sell them on why you “should” be in front of the camera as well as behind it. It should be about who’s best for the role and the big picture. If someone is good enough to do two roles and is able to, they should do it. The goal is to make the project as good as possible.
SHORT VERSION: Yes, others go through this. I’d say most “Type A” “Creative Types” (whatever you want to call them) do.
February 24, 2010 at 1:11 pm,
Wow! Awesome article. It’s like you jumped inside my head.
I started as an actress and when I jumped to the other side of the camera I discovered this crazy voice in my head that told me I had to tone down the outer persona I had become connected to being an actress…you know look pretty at all times, dress nice, have pop and personality. It was a serious mind f**k at first. Who am I? How am I coming across? What is of value here. My talent or my looks?
So thank you for being so candid with your own struggle with the many hats. I think your post indicates it’s headed in the right direction. More and more it’s okay to have all those hats and have them be valued equally.
I also think it difficult to compare men and women. We have different societal challenges.
But in the end it’s about doing what all those women you mentioned already do…ignores what anybody thinks of them and handles their business.
Hooray for Power Chicks and being a geek, beautiful, talented and smart all at once.
Oh…can I be at that slumber party if it every happens. :)
February 24, 2010 at 12:56 pm,
Oh and P.S. Cupcakes rock.
February 24, 2010 at 12:41 pm,
I think it is all performers insecurities. My producing partner always tries to get me not to act in the things I write, but he does it because no matter what anyone says, doing it all takes time away in production. So when you are directing/acting/producing, something will always suffer, no matter how talented you are.
But, having said that, sticking to your guns and doing the things you love, that’s all that matters. And I think you rock for knowing all aspects of the filmmaking realm. Personally, it makes me respect you more than diminish it. Cheers.
February 24, 2010 at 12:40 pm,